Bonding between working mother and child
This article about the impact of working mother and their children. How the mother struggle to take care for their child development and how the child looking for affection and support from the mother.
Today's it became very common in all families that women are working. It can't say wrong because it become compulsory and force to women to work and so to manage the economic finance of the family. But in past, society thinks that working women outside the home will affect the development of children.
women's career and life at home
Yes, this became major question on development of children to all working women – whether to continue their job or stay at home to take care of children. But when we ask answer from each, it that answers will be unique. In present, the working of women depends on her family situation or her individual wish. Many women start working before their marriage and even continue after their marriage without any dilemma.
Once the women became pregnancy, the question arise to themselves whether to quit the job or not. Women are pillar to their family, the one who take care of each member at home and also manage her job pressure in the work place. As she try to balance both, but still her mind in impact of child growth.
Statistics of working women
When we see the statistics of working women after the child birth will be increasing in our day-to-day life. In last ten years back only 7% to 9% women are working after the child birth but now in the recent study they are nearly 64% to 66% women are working after the child birth. The most reason for this, due to finance problem in the family. Or on other side if we see, it is due to women own security. She want to make successful career and at the same time to balance her family in success.
Financial status of the family
Financial problem levels will be different in each family. In some family there may be parents and children are living. But in some family it can be joint family or grandparents are living along with their children and grand children. In such family where only income of the father may be not enough to satisfy all their basic needs. This may push and decide the women to move to workforce and to manage the situation of the family.
planning for future safe
When the women start working then the couple may plans one salary can spent for the important expenses likes education fees, house rent, and food provision etc. And other salary to meet medical insurance, life insurance etc and try to save some money in their bank account for future safe or for emergency purpose. Thus already said they will be unique answer why the purpose of the women to be work.
Always the women feels that she wants to keep her family very happy. She thinks that is her responsibility to solve any problem in the family. When it comes to money problem then she just wants to increase the financial position to the high stage. But the real problem starts here to her, what will be happen to the development of child in her absence? The society won't stop asking questions even though they face the same problem in their own life. They blame those mother won't love their children and family. There will be long debut when it comes to this topic between home maker and working women. There is no perfect judgment to the topic and stands just like a million dollar question for very long time.
Change of women's life style
In present, the cost of living is increasing. This is another reason for mother to move into workforce. Even though the family members are small, they can't able to manage their expenses. In decades ago, we hear women working only in day time (mostly 10 AM to 5 PM). This makes them to balance both the home and work equally. Also she can able to spend time for child education after she back to home. But now to manage the cost of living, the women are ready to work in any shifts. The stress of women increased in both working place and at home. Slowly she starts losing her lack of attention at home and also in child development in most time.
If we look of home maker we can't say they are happy to stay at home and they are good in looking their family and succeed in child development. When we consider them that they feel like having the same routine work. At one stage it leads them to mental depression. From there point of view if we see, the outer world knowledge to them will be very less compare to working women. Here the problem who looking better and succeed in child development whether it is working women or home maker.
Mental depression of the child
The problem of mother is all set on one side and when we come to the child point of view, the problem will be completely different on their side. The child always has good bond relationship more on their mother when compare with their father at childhood. At small age the child fully grown on mother's shelter. Each child has unique in behavior but when it comes to caring they completely look up from their mother. They are certain children even on their mature age still they look everything from mother. Such problems mostly pointed in case of single child for their parent. The child once reach home from school or college, they look for their mother to welcome them to home or serve the food while eating or time to share their moments. The child may be mentally disturbed, when it continues. Here the problem is loneliness. The result is, the child will be lack in their studies.
Change in the child's behavior
In this current world, the child is easily can attach in any good or bad activities. How the working mother knows that the child really utilizing their time only to studies when they reach home. To make them job easily they providing internet connecting to child for their study reference. But they are many children using the internet in wrong manner, when parents are not in home. They were learning more beyond the age apart from their studies. They are plenty of social networking sites the child connect to it and spending most time in chatting with friends and also with unknown. Mostly they addict to it. When we look in home maker families, the same thing will be happens they also. Here the mother provides separate study room for child with internet connection and she will be relaxed with the television programs. The child does everything inside the room without able to noticed by their mother.
There is another problem the child feels themselves as independent once they reach home. Some child take their mobile phone talk with others for long hours or some start playing video games on television or some goes to park/ ground on the nearby to their home and spend the entire time with road side buddies. Playing with the road buddies is not aware to their parents. The children start learning new terrible languages from them which is completely unknown to their mother. The new slang and code language which they slowly try to implement at home in front of their parents. Speaking in code words to their friend in front of the mother more than the direct communication in which she thinks that they discussing something related to their subjects.
In some homes the mother doesn't have the complete time to look back the child progress in education. She is totally imbalance of her office work and family members. They provide tuition arrangements for the child. But the children cheat their parents by roaming with friends by bunking the tuition classes. Sure the child will be back in studies. When the mother was unaware of such behavior of child, then how the child will be serious in their own studies. Here the parents itself spoiling the child education. And the child starts speaking lies at home and won't communicate their own status of studies to their parents. Even some child sign their own progress has parent signature.
Lack of mother care
At school they learn more from the teacher. But mother should guide them at home from their primary age to make their education basement stronger. When she fails to do her duty to her child then, then the child will not be good in the grammar or not able to read or write a single sentence properly when they go the higher level classes. This is because the child loses their mother guidance from the childhood. More over in many places at present we can see the mother bond with child only three to six months after the time of delivery, then once she start going to office and the child come under the care of any one of the family member.
Most of the mother thinks that they caring well of their child. Some even after the tight schedule of work they try to spend the less quality time for their child studies. How they know, what the child actually when their absence. Really we can't say the fault fully blame on the child. The child doesn't have the maturity thinking till to certain age to judge certain thinks. And also they don't know what is good or bad to do.
The child till certain age of growth thinks that the mother is the whole world in their life. When they are kid, the mother is the only a big company to them. They learn how to speak, walk and to talk from the support of mother. They sleep on their mother lap and play with the mother in each day. When the child loosing such caring then there step into depression stage. The child can't able understand the financial problem of the family in very small age. They can't able to guess because of the money problem that their mother is going for job to balance the situation.
The word caring and love is the major problem in this situation. The child always won't expect their father to be with them for all time. But sure they expect love and support from their mother. They know mother is backbone to them and even to the father, she is very important. It is better the couple should understood the financial problem will not be standard all the time. The couple may adjust the financial problem for certain years until their child gets maturity about to understand everything. The mother can scarify her life as home maker to certain period.
Proper way to plan for child development
We can earn money in many right ways that one should understand. They are many uneducated women we can see in the real life. Those women who earn money by sitting in home at the same time take caring their children. Even they are plenty opportunities to educated women also. Today online business became very helpful for those peoples. They also some women may be train in certain extra curriculum. They can use this opportunities at those times. Sure it won't bring very big income but helpful to overcome small expenses. They may time for the child to understand about the situation of their family. Then the mother can decide, going for a job or not. At that time she can take decision - can be due to improve her financial status or to shine in her career life.
You have presented the scene of mother and child as a Child Psychologist and it is now the turn for mother to sit and think and decide on what to do on their child's life in their childhood.
I just wanted a clarification, your statistics on working women after child's birth, is it pertain to all women whether they worked prior to child birth or those who left the job after the child birth?. Only now the situation has come to leave the job after child birth and again go for a job but in previous decades leaving a job is not that easy as they may not get it again.